Archive for the ‘Life’ Category

If you wouldn’t be welcomed back, why are you staying anyway?
January 20, 2009

How many things do we do on a daily basis that we hate doing?

I personally hate washing dishes & talking on the phone. (I’sn’t that what dishwashers & email are for?)

For my husband, unfortunately, it’s working each day @ a well-paying job he’s supposed to be “thankful” for during a recession, even though he finds absolutely no joy in his profession. He’s even described a sinking feeling that returns each day when he steps onto the elevator & anticipates the day ahead of him.

Knowing this, a  post I read today by Alexis Martin Neely really struck a chord inside of me. Although I pride myself on being organized & adept @ purging, I too hold onto people & things & opportunities after they are no longer of use or interesting & sometimes even after they’ve proven totally useless whatsoever. Deep down, I know it’s because I’m afraid that I’ll clean out all of the quantity…the closet full of shoes, the Blackberry filled with numbers i’ll never call…& look around me & feel utterly empty & alone.

Now, let’s be realistic, never doing the dishes, becoming a hermit & my husband spontaneously quitting his job would all be bad ideas. We all have to do things we don’t want to do, because we realize their value. However, we’re not required to forever devote our time & energy to activities & people that are draining to the spirit & uncompromising. We are entitled to be happy, I believe it’s our right & purpose as humans.

Remember the Christina Aguilera song, “What a Girl Wants?”…okay, maybe you don’t want to, maybe I shouldn’t be admitting that I do…”they say if you love something let it go, if it comes back it’s yours & that’s how you know, it’s for keeps yeah it’s for sure & you’re ready & willing to give me more…” (I’m a 90s bubblegum pop baby, sue me) The point is, in quality relationships, whether business or personal, we can always come back, even if it’s only to say hi or ask for advice. As a great contributor & valued member of the relationship, you’d rightly be welcomed back (think of how pleased grandma’s voice sounds after you call her out of the blue to check in). If not, as Alexis Martin Neely puts it, “If you wouldn’t be welcomed back, why are you staying anyway?”

Here’s to letting go, realizing our self-worth & not accepting anything less than what we deserve…


Regrets & Acceptance…
January 18, 2009

I’ve been struggling with so much going on in my head these days. I’m positive I’m not the only person to ever feel this way, but I really am not enjoying company in such misery. In an effort to reclaim serenity, purpose & direction, I’m putting it all out there. Let it be the blog world’s problem & not mine…thx to CityMama for the inspiration:

I Regret:

  • Compromising my character by allowing myself to treat others in a way I wouldn’t like to be treated
  • Moving into a posh center city apartment we couldn’t really afford because it felt nice
  • Not allowing myself to do small things that feel nice so I don’t feel desperate to do big things that feel nice
  • Not using a schedule & relying on memory for things that are important
  • Making decisions for “the money”
  • Not finding mentors sooner
  • Spending so much time indoors with my son knowing we both love the outdoors
  • Hesitating when I’m required to be unapologetically me
  • Seeing the beauty in other’s imperfections & not my own
  • Not going to the beach more often, or better yet, living near the beach, when I know it’s where I feel my best

I Accept:

  • That I can’t be all things to all people, but I can be a big help & a great friend to quite a few
  • That moms & wives need time to be just women from time to time
  • That sending my son to daycare part time will be best for EVERYONE in my family
  • That reading every blog & being a part of every seeming relevant social network is a big waste of time
  • That the occasional glass of wine @ 1pm will make me live longer & feel good, even if it makes me seem like a lush
  • That I will say really stupid & ridiculous things sometimes, but it’s okay, because I’m not like anyone else in success or failures
  • That having a life does not make me a bad mom
  • That there is a such thing as too many mentors
  • That if it won’t matter in 5 years, it’s not worth getting all worked up over anyway
  • That time doesn’t change things on its own, but it will give me a chance to change

Oh so cliche…
January 13, 2009

It’s a new year & there are probably hundreds, thousands, better yet, hundreds of thousands of other people out there in the internet world who are saying, just like me, “I wanna start a new blog.” Yup, I’m just like you all…

This year is a little different though. Why?

I read an incredibly informative blog by Christine Kane.

This year, unlike resolutions, I’m focusing on GENEROSITY.

In an effort to share more of myself, my time, my resources, my knowledge & my network…i’m creating this blog.